Sunday, October 31, 2010

Carl Time



A baseball rant from Carl.  He rips on Lincecum for looking like a girl and ends up picking the Yankees to win it all in 2011.  I guess Carl is a Yankee fan.  Are most NY Giants fans also Yankees fans?  Does that mean Mets fans are usually Jets fans?  I know that James does not fit that rule.  He is also a Rangers fan...I am just starting to ramble here.  Time to go to bed.

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Awkward Television Moments


This week's television featured a few very awkward moments.  To the point that I was sick to my stomach or laughing my ass off.

Boardwalk Empire
The creepy government agent looking at Mrs. Schroeder's photo became very creepy.  He lays out the towel, pushes his wife's picture down so she can not "look" at him, and then gets out the belt.  I naturally assume he will partake in a little autoerotic asphyxiation.  Am I the only one who thought that?  Screw you guys.  Instead he punishes himself for having impure thoughts.  Stupid religion.

Worth masturbating to, not worth beating yourself with a belt...
Aside from that the episode was pretty awesome.  Jimmy hatches a plan to get back at the Irish.  And then Al insults him at a party, but Jimmy rolls with it and throws out his own insults.  Apparently Al Capone does not like that too much (I wonder how historical some of this is?).

Sons of Anarchy
SAMCRO heads to Ireland to get Jax's son back.  First though they have to get drunk and party with SAMBEL.  Jax meets Trinity and there are some instant sparks.  Jax does a bare-knuckle fight with Liam.  Trinity wants to wrap his hands and she is definitely giving him the fuck-me eyes.  After the fight she leads him to a shower, where someone makes the joke that she needs to scrub his back.  Normally this would just be another normal day for someone in the club, except in this instance, Trinity is Jax's half-sister.

Fortunately, Father Kellan came to the rescue.  He wanted to talk to Jax about his son.  Crisis averted.  Score one point for religion.






Always Sunny
Obviously this one was just meant to be funny.  The whole episode was hilarious, as the gang tries to recreate what happened at the Halloween party that ended up with Dee getting pregnant by one of them.  After everything is settled, they think it was actually Dennis who slept with Dee, which causes Dennis to vomit.  Dee then reveals that it was none of them and she just said it to screw with them and prove that they did care who the father was.  The gang then insults her and leaves without waiting to hear who the daddy actually is.  

The Scariest of Them All: The Most Creepy, Disturbing, Frightening Films

(Film still of ill-fated Marion Crane (Janet Leigh) from Alfred Hitchcock's  horror classic Psycho)



***


 According to the popular magazine Entertainment Weekly, Stephen King's The Shining with Jack Nicholson is the scariest film of all time.
On The Chicago Film Critics Association 100 Scariest Movies list, Alfred Hitchcock's Psycho is number one, followed by The Exorcist and in third, John Carpenter's Halloween.

I disagree.

Psycho and Halloween are classic, good horror films, as well as The Exorcist and  
The Shining, but scary? 
Not one bit to me.

To be honest, I haven't seen one movie yet that has truly shaken me to my core and I can label "The Scariest Movie I Have Ever Seen!"
I'm not easily scared or disturbed by horror films, in fact, I find myself chuckling at most because most are so outrageously improbable that to be scared would be silly.

It's rare, but I am scare-able.

The types of horror films that do make think twice before closing my eyes for sleep are alien movies and more thriller/horrors with human killers rather than monsters.

 The last movie that really had me covering my eyes during some parts and spooked afterward, is the 2009 alien supposedly-based-on-true-events, film The Fourth Kind.

If I had to choose, I would have to say, the most frightening, disturbing, creepy film I've ever seen is the 2008 Funny Games (remake of a the 1997 Austrian original). Two seemingly nice, normal, well-groomed young men invade a family of three's home and play "funny" torturous games with them resulting in death times three. It's so scary because it can actually happen. Horrific realistic plots as such terrify me the most. 


In the spirit of Halloween, here's the Cinemanista list of films that have disturbed me, 

creeped me out or frightened me in some way:
(*Don't be surprised that some are not traditional horror or even horror films*)





FUNNY 
GAMES

OH THE HORROR!:
Two baby-faced young men terrorize a family with unfunny games. 

TRAILER:
  http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1809765878/trailer





THE
FOURTH KIND

OH THE HORROR!:
Supposed based on true events about alien communication and abduction.

TRAILER:
http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1810064790/trailer



THE 
STRANGERS
OH THE HORROR!:
Three masked strangers play cat and mouse games with a couple.

TRAILER:
http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1809775079/trailer



SIGNS
OH THE HORROR!:
Crop circles and UFOs appear all over the world, with an alien finding refuge in a family's home.


TRAILER:
http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1807733433/trailer



FIRE 
IN THE SKY
OH THE HORROR!:
Alien abduction story based on supposed true events of a man.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9LhshgLJuuM



THE RING
OH THE HORROR!:
Watching a videotape causes people to die.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_nLt6bUVoCQ




DIABOLIQUE
OH THE HORROR!:
Two women, a wife and mistress, plan to kill their lover.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JdJbwHRMcfI



BOOK OF SHADOWS
BLAIR WITCH 2
OH THE HORROR!:
A group of teens go in search of The Blair Witch after seeing The Blair Witch Project.


TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8WtrIgbvsWU



THE HILLS 
HAVE EYES
OH THE HORROR!:
A family is picked off one by one by a group of mutants.
 and



FINAL 
DESTINATION 2
 OH THE HORROR!:
Teens and adults think they escaped death only to find out they didn't. 


TRAILER 1:
TRAILER 2:
After visiting a fertility clinic, a woman is impregnated with the Devil's DNA. 

TRAILER:
http://www.reelzchannel.com/movie/166151/blessed/clips


VACANCY
OH THE HORROR!:
A couple checks into a motel that happens to make snuff films.


TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-TK2gqYIVuc



JEEPERS 
CREEPERS
OH THE HORROR!:
A brother and sister encounter The Creeper, a demon who takes body parts.


TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ouUO42AkZV0




ARLINGTON 
ROAD
OH THE HORROR!:
A man suspects his neighbors are a family of terrorists.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nk2CPzIgBRo


THE
ASTRONAUT'S
WIFE
OH THE HORROR!:
A woman's astronaut husband returns after a mission, looking like himself but actual an alien.


TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYe7kAB6SII




DEVIL'S 
ADVOCATE
OH THE HORROR!:
A lawyer who never has lost a case, is offered a job at a firm from a man who turns out to be the Devil.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jh2jcBCF9bY



THE 
FORGOTTEN
OH THE HORROR!:
A woman's memory of her son is partially erased by aliens who are experimenting with humans to determine if the parent/child bond can be taken away.


TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARLO5zj_3X4



MOTHMAN 
PROPHECIES

OH THE HORROR!:
A town is haunted by The Mothman--- a creature with wings, based on actual events.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jP4P7VPx2zM


CANNIBAL
HOLOCAUST
OH THE HORROR!:
A group of explorers travel to the Amazon to document the indigenous tribes living there whom turn out to be very hostile.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZ-Xp6VC7RQ



WAR OF 
THE WORLDS
OH THE HORROR!:
Aliens invade the earth.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VV5NbdpZZYo


THE MIST
OH THE HORROR!:
Monsters take over a small town and come after a group of people in a supermarket.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LhCKXJNGzN8



CLOVERFIELD
OH THE HORROR!:
A monster invasion in New York City is caught on tape.

TRAILER:
http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1809873032/trailer


INVASION 
OF THE 
BODY SNATCHERS

OH THE HORROR!:
An alien life form invades the earth turning people into pod people.


TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZNfx3yed5I


THE BIRDS
OH THE HORROR!:
Killer birds terrorize a small town.


TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MZjaVdJt59U



ROSEMARY'S 
BABY

OH THE HORROR!:
The Devil impregnates a woman named Rosemary.


TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ogfqfnt2Aaw




HARD CANDY
OH THE HORROR!:
A pedophile meets a young girl online and the tables are turned. 

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1PXYjFl0uXg




DANIKA
OH THE HORROR!:
A wife and mother named Danika starts to have hallucinations about horrific things happening to herself, her family and people around her.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQjtOV1Qd2U



WIND CHILL

 OH THE HORROR!:
A girl and guy find themselves snowed in, in a car, on a supposedly haunted road.


TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uiwyITqDZlk




P2
OH THE HORROR!:
A crazed security guard in love with a young woman, kidnaps her.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cYEgrQ8kdmw



30 DAYS 
OF NIGHT
OH THE HORROR!:
Vampires descend on an Alaskan town that is in darkness for 30 days.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3zA5hhSDLA4&feature=channel


WES CRAVEN'S
NEW NIGHTMARE
OH THE HORROR!:
In this Freddy film, Freddy is a fictitious film villain who stalks and kills off those who worked on Nightmare on Elm street films.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TV8za5nWxwo



HOSTEL 2

and

HOSTEL
OH THE HORROR!:
A group of young people are lured into hostels where they are set-up to be sold and killed to a murderous club that kill people for kicks.




TURISTAS
OH THE HORROR!:
A group of young people in Brazil are set-up for organ theft.


TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j_fpOZ8pHuY



THE RUINS
OH THE HORROR!:
Two couples on vacation in Mexico stumble into a eerie Mayan ruin where the Mayans there won't let them leave.


TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vzdto154_to



TEXAS CHAINSAW 
MASSACRE:
THE BEGINNING

and

THE TEXAS
CHAINSAW MASSACRE
OH THE HORROR!:
A killer with a chain saw and his demented family, based on supposed true events.

TRAILER 1:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=16vUScpEtLI


TRAILER 2:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mra_Z3cpGCM




HOUSE OF 
1000 CORPSES

and


THE DEVIL'S
REJECTS
OH THE HORROR!:
A family of maniacs who like to kill.

TRAILER 1:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sa98CctMb38


TRAILER 2:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WSOm_okHzgY



THE WITCHES
OH THE HORROR!:
Witches from all around the world plot to kill off children by turning them into mice.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LsA1L3M0y4g



CREEPSHOW

OH THE HORROR!:
Killer roaches.
(*The story They're Creeping Up On You!)


TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1bO3gyT3Imc



THE BREED
OH THE HORROR!:
Killer dogs.


TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7iyd4rryhyA



DEADLY EYES/
NIGHT EYES/
RATS
 OH THE HORROR!:
Killer rats.

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=khywOKn-j6k



CITY
OF THE
WALKING DEAD
OH THE HORROR!:
Super fast zombies who not only eat people but use weapons to kill as well.

TRAILER:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c-yhh7OYgl0





*Entertainment Weekly's 
20 Scariest Movies of All Time:
*Chicago Film Critics 
Top 100 Scariest Movies:

Friday, October 29, 2010

See Saw


VERDICT:
GO SEE! 
*(But for fans of the Saw series or watching this finale to the series is pointless. )

WHY:
If you're a Saw lover, I don't need to tell you to go see the final chapter to the madness Jigsaw started. 
Filled with cool, complicated, deadly death traps for deserving victims that only exists in Saw's world and a ending that fans should love, Saw 3D: The Final Chapter is not to be missed. Although, the downside is the 3D. If you think blood and gore galore will be flying at you, think again. Drops of blood and gore is more like it. 2D would have been good enough.



REVIEW:
I am not a fan of the Saw series.
It's probably my least favorite horror series.
The only reason I saw Saw 3D: The Final Chapter is because someone paid for my ticket for me to join them in seeing it.
I was though, curious if this seventh film in the seeming never ending Saw franchise really was the last (mum's the word!)--- but not curious enough to pay to see it for myself!
I've somehow stomached three earlier Saw movies (II, III and V). I saw the first one (II for me) just out of curiosity to see what the hype was about (and still don't know!).
The only thing I like about the Saw series is the origin of John Kramer/Jigsaw (played creepily and smartly by Tobin Bell)--- how after a botched suicide attempt after he learns he has a tumor, he appreciates life more and sets out to "help" wasteful people appreciate theirs by testing their will to live.
However, the nasty traps the victims are put into, which Saw fans seem to love the most, never wowed me in horror.
They pretty much make me laugh because they are so ridiculous.
But I must admit, in Saw 3D, some of the traps set up by Jigsaw's copycat are cool and made we wince a bit--- especially the opening trap with two guys, a girl and three fitting saws.
The way the story is told is good--- through flashbacks mixed with the present---although it was hard to tell at times which was which because I'm not familiar with the back stories for certain characters where their back stories are shown.
The added 3D factor is the worst thing about the film. What 3D? Because nothing significant (blood and guts) popped out the way I thought it would--- some of the trailers beforehand showed more 3D!
So how did it end?
Did Jigsaw somehow rise from the grave even though he was murdered in III?
Was this really the final chapter in the Saw series?
I want to give it away but I won't!
You will have to go see Saw 3D yourself to find out!
From the audience's reaction of whistles and claps, most (there was one guy who loudly displayed his distaste for the ending) Saw fans loved the ending.
But because I'm not a fan, of course I rolled my eyes and groaned.