worst sonnet ever

When i have to stop and think about the

Passing traffic; Clocks slow because i

feel at ease in your innocent presence.

Glaring through my hair at paint that's now dry

on the surface, stained upon your skin.

Isn't it funny when you try to wash it

off but all it does is stick? It sinks in

quite well, doesn't it? After a while you wash it

off. Only now you find it surprising that

something you have grown so use to is gone.

Should you not feel happy and relieved? What

you once wanted no longer feels right. Gone

is the color that brightened up the day.

Changes made as things delay. I cant stay.

Charlie Sheen the Movie Starring...

 (Charismatic and erratic actor, Charlie Sheen)

Inevitable, with Charlie Sheen everywhere in the news these days, a movie, either for television or for the big screen probably will be happening.

Which lucky actor would WIN the role of Sheen?

 Charlie Sheen 

(of course!)

With Sheen's massive ego, I wouldn't put it past him to request to star in his own biopic!

That would be very cool I have to admit.

Other actors who could pull off playing Sheen due to their uncanny resemblance to him:

Jason Bateman

 Nathan Fillion

 Kyle MacLachlan

  
Actors who don't resemble Sheen but would without a doubt nail his crazy antics to a tee due to their bouts of own zaniness at one point:




 William Baldwin

 Tom Cruise

 Joaquin Phoenix

***

Myspace Blogposts Part Five

I am about to delete my myspace account, but I figured I would share with you some of blog posts I wrote on there.  Do not judge me.

Eating The Souls of Small South American Monkeys

Yesterday I woke up to find my apartment completely gone.  Not destroyed mind you, just missing, disappeared.  A figment of my imagination.  At that point I did the only thing one can do in said situation.  I walked away.

I decided to walk south.  Why south you ask?  Well, why not?  Along the way, I met many interesting people, and soon they began to join my ranks and followed me to my destination:  Corpus Christi, Texas.

Outside of the city we camped, preparing our weapons for the assault.  My army numbered around 20,000.  The cities walls and defenses would easily be overrun.  I am sure you are wondering where the weapons came from and the only answer I have is that this is my story and stop asking so many damn questions.

The battle did not last very long, and soon the city was left in ruins.  The people of Corpus Christi would have been better served remembering their history:  invaders always come from the North.  Let this be a warning to everyone out there.

We like Detroit 1-8-7

No, seriously, we like the show, it's just that I think if you're going to call a show 1-8-7, how can that not be the theme song?

It's a competently-made cop show, and we're big fans of Michael Imperioli as Fitch. But I'm an even bigger fan of Natalie Martinez, who is incredibly hot. Evidence follows.

Hell, I'd watch her in anything. On that note, I'll check out Death Race.

Fantasy Baseball Draft Results: Hitters

As I said before, I would go through each team and discuss their lineups.  I will use their projected stats to see how each team stacks up against each other.  The projections I used come from fangraphs (Rotochamp's projections). 

Here are the totals after I punched in everyone's current starting lineups:

I then decided to assign a 12 to 1 point scale for each category.  This is how each team finished.

My Team

 I really thought my team would be a little bit higher than this.  I am very strong in the power department, but bad at the rate categories.

I also thought I did a good job of drafting for stolen bases, but I guess I was wrong.  I could probably trade someone for a high average/OBP guy.









James

 Considering that James autodrafted his team, pretty impressive that his is projected number one.

He counters a low average power-hitter, with a high average SB guy.  Very lucky how that worked out.  I honestly do not believe that Mark Reynolds will hit .230 as they projected.  I also could see Aubrey Huff having a bit of a regression from last season.








Offord

High average and high RBIs. I do believe his team has the most favorable projections.  It almost seems like rotochamp does not show much regression for some of the older players.

I could also see some health issues working against Offord.  Manny/Pedroia/Konerko...can they all stay healthy?

In all honesty though, I like his lineup.








Ryan

I would almost guarantee that Ryan believes his team is the best in the land.  It is funny when you look at his team and Offord's.  Ryan has a few great categories and then some very mediocre categories.  Offord is a nice steady 7 except for two dominating categories.  Interesting.

I honestly think he could afford to make a trade to try and pick up a power-hitter who will drive in some runs.  Aside from Pujols, he has no one that is a candidate for 100 RBIs.  Also, he has three guys projecting for an OBP over .400. 






Sean

Another auto-drafted team.  He fared pretty well.  Maybe I should do this from now on...














Gideon

I really think Gideon's team is pretty underrated.  A bunch of these guys are projected a little lower than I expected.

Since this is a head-to-head league, I could see Gideon's team just stomping people in three categories each week and then squeaking out stolen bases and another one.










I am going to keep going, but I may not comment on every team.


Dave

Power, not much else.  That is what I would expect from auto-drafting. 















JasonNick

I love that outfield...















Shelley

I would have been pissed if the team that is starting Mike Aviles, Ryan Doumit, Juan Pierre, and Ben Zobrist would have been projected higher than me.












Pat

Dan

Keep drafting Orioles Dan!  Also, Soto and Wieters in your lineup?  Great strategy.













Imler

I do not think the projections were kind to his team at all.  Nice batting average though.  If I were Imler, I might start trying to make some moves.













So there are the teams.  Should be an interesting season.  Obviously projections are never 100% accurate, but it is nice to see where you might need help.  We look at pitching tomorrow maybe.

Will Sucker Punch Be A Knockout or Will It Suck?

(Blondie, Amber, Baby Doll, Sweet Pea and Rocket: 

The girls of the upcoming fantasy action film Sucker Punch.)

This Friday, Sucker Punch, the action film very coolly starring five young women (Emily Browning, Abbie Cornish, Jena Malone, Vanessa Hudgens and Jamie Chung) who kick butt and know who to use a weapon well, opens.

I'm pretty excited because when is the last time a movie starring a group of females as action heroes been widely released?

Ironically Sucker Punch (written and directed by Zack Snyder who directed  2007's amazing 300 (ironically which was was pretty much made up of an all male cast) ) comes a year after 2010's testosterone filled action film The Expendables.

It's so great to see a group of girls finally have a turn fighting, getting dirty and kicking ass instead of the norm of males being the action stars.

BUT...

Part of me wonders will the girls of Sucker Punch be strong enough to be categorized as action heroes?

With the exception of Rocket's name--- Baby Doll, Blondie, Amber and Sweet Pea sure don't seem tough based on their cutesy names. 

And especially in the sexy get-ups they're wearing.

Sexy action hero girls can be tough of course, but they're the cliche for female action stars.

I wonder if the Sucker Punch girl's beauty and sexy costumes will distract from their fighting? 

Or will it make them cooler because they are beautiful and sexy and capable of as much destruction as men?

I'm hoping it's the latter.

It should be interesting to see if theatres will be more estrogen filled but of course the scantily clad girls are meant to entice male audiences.

Even though the Sucker Punchers are pretty and girly and don't look so tough (with the exception of Abbie Cornish's Sweet Pea)--- it's still great to see girls whipping some butt!

Here's to Sucker Punch being a knockout!

Dear Bradley Cooper

Over the weekend the movie Limitless was the number one movie at the box office.  Is it just me or does this movie look extremely stupid?  It got me thinking about all the actors who have went down this path that Bradley Cooper is starting to venture.  So Mr. Cooper, I am writing this for you.  Look at these actors who started out in a cool movie and then did a bunch of crappy movies.
There seems to be a pattern to these actors:  do a movie that earns you points, then some crappy action movies, then some kind of sports movie.  After that, it can either go way downhill or you can rebound...

Josh Lucas

 He started out with some pretty good supporting roles in Hulk, Wonderland, and A Beautiful Mind.  I am guessing that his big role where people really liked him was Sweet Home Alabama.  I never saw that one, but I know some folks who said it was not so bad for what it was.

Then it seemed like he was everywhere or at least being mentioned in every potential movie.  Then came the crappy action movies:  Stealth and Poseidon.  Then he played a basketball coach in Glory Road.

Where the hell did he go after that?  I am sure he has done some very worthwhile projects, but nothing that I remember.  I have heard he was in that new lawyer movie, and it was not awful.

Matthew McConaughey

He was so cool in Dazed and Confused (I do not believe he was actually acting in that movie though), and then he was really good in A Time to Kill.  Then he was in Contact, Amistad, and The Newton Boys (I enjoyed that movie, sue me).

Then it happened...Sahara, Failure to Launch, Reign of Fire, The Wedding Planner, How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days.  Hell I could probably keep going.  He also did a sports movie:  We Are Marshall.   Sometimes I think he just says screw it and let me not act and just be myself.

I think that was why he was so amusing in Tropic Thunder.  Speaking of The Lincoln Lawyer, he stars in it.  Is that a weird coincidence.  Also, Bradley Cooper was in Failure to Launch.  That was one of the movies that kind of launched him.  He was hilarious in that movie.

Adrien Brody
What a sad case.  He rises up with The Pianist, then rocks it in The Jacket.  He was also good in King Kong and Hollywoodland.  Then he was in Splice and Predators.  I will say this though, he was definitely pretty ripped in Predators.  Now he is singing in some beer commercials.  What is next?  Will he be doing crappy local television ads for some law firm?

I actually have faith that he could turn it around...

I think you people get the idea of where this is going.  Let us take a look at a few other actors who seemed so promising, then do a bunch of crappy movies:

Gerard Butler and Clive Owen
These two will turn it around.  They are both filthy rich, so I imagine they will start being a little more picky about their roles.

Ben Affleck and Matt Damon

They were cool in the Kevin Smith movies, then they hit it big with Good Will Hunting.  After that it seemed like Matt Damon did some pretty awesome movies (minus All the Pretty Horses).  He seemed to be going down a more comedic path and then he did the Bourne movies and people realized he could be an action star.

Ben was in some big time movies, but he was in so many shitty action films.  Hey Bradley, look at some of Ben Affleck's roles:  Paycheck, Reindeer Games...do those sound like Limitless.  Ben was at least smart and decided to start directing.  Maybe you can do that at some point Brad.

In fact, Matt Damon has said before that he almost ended up being in Daredevil and at that point in his career he would have taken just about any role offered to him.  Do not fall into that path.

Cuba Gooding Jr.
At one point, I thought he was going to be some great actor.  He won an Oscar for Jerry Maguire.  He was good in Boyz n the Hood and Judgement Night.  He was pretty cool in As Good as it Gets.  He was touching in Men of Honor.

Then wow.  Seriously.  Do you really want to be known as the guy who was in Boat Trip, Rat Race, Snow Dogs, or Radio?  Nowadays he can be seen in any number of Direct-to-DVD films such as...oh screw it, who has even cares.

So Mr. Cooper, please heed this warning.  If you go out and do some kind of true story movie next, such as playing a sports coach or maybe a handicapped individual from the military, then you might as well hang it up.

I hope the best for you.