The Pensblog and Archer

If you read the Pensblog, then you have probably seen some Stephen S.'s artwork, if not click here and check some of it out.  He has gotten a job as an illustrator for Archer, which as you know, is one of my favorite shows.  Buy some of his artwork so he can move to Atlanta...

Also, here is a funny video of the show.

Royal GOTW

Sorry that I am late getting this week's GOTW up, I was up all morning watching the Royal Wedding.  Okay, that is not true whatsoever.  I worked third shift, and fell asleep when I got home.  I figure since everyone was all focused on how hot Kate Middleton looked in her dress, I would take this moment to remind you that no one gives a shit about British royalty.  Can anyone remember the last time they were relevant?  Me neither...

Now here is a hot queen:  Mary, also known as Bloody Mary.  She was great, killed a bunch of Protestants and that is pretty much good enough for me.  Not too many pictures out there of her, but I work with what I can get...

This is a costume called Bloody Mary.  I highly doubt that the Queen actually killed the Protestants herself, but hey, the chick looks pretty good.

This is Sarah Bolger portraying the sexy queen on The Tudors.  I am not sure how old she is in this picture though, she could have been 17, which means that I would be a very dirty individual for making comments.

And now, the real Queen Mary, mmmm, what a sexy woman.

Swept up in The Fall

The most beautiful film I may have ever seen is Tarsem Singh;s The Fall.  Many who saw Singh's previous film The Cell with J-Lo and Vincent D'inofrio have marveled at Singh's capacity for creating imprcably layered and stunning visual images.  The Fall brings it tenfold. 

The Fall is a tale within a tale, initially set in a Los Angeles hospital in the 1920s, wherein a little Serbian girl, Alexandria, has a chance meeting with a depressed and death-driven stunt double, Roy.  Both characters suffer their injuries from a fall, one picking oranges in the LA groves, one on a horse off a train bridge in an attempt to end his life.  Ever suicidal over not only the loss of the woman he loved but also now the movement of his lower limbs, Roy lures Alexandria into his confidence with a marvelous tale, in hopes that she will steal enough morphine tablets for him to finally kick the bucket.

The tale he tells is an epic, with elements from around the world.  What Roy describes, however, is not completely what we see, because the masterful visuals of the tale are through the imaginative young eyes of Alexandria.  Roy's characters, for instance, include an "indian wounded over the loss of his squaw," but Alexandria, whose family immigrated from Persia, conjures him as katara-wielding man, clothed in fine vibrant silk.

New Movies Playing!

Fast Five

What's It About?

The 5th installment in the Fast and the Furious series--- reuniting all the main characters from the previous films + adding Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson.

 

Trailer:

http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1810147120/video

PREDICTION:
"It looks like too much, so much fun! I love the mash-up of all the Fast and the Furious characters especially--- and the addition of 'The Rock' adds even more! Seeing Vin Diesel and The Rock go at it in their fight scene should be something great! This installment is guaranteed to knock 2009's unexciting Fast & Furious out!"

*

Dylan Dog: Dead of Night

What's It About?

A P.I. who takes cases for the undead.

 

Trailer:

http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1810160166/video

PREDICTION:
"It looks pretty fun---cool, original plot, based upon the comic book series Dylan Dog."

*

Hoodwinked Too!: Hood vs. Evil

What's It About?

The 2nd installment of the Hoodwinked! backwards fairytale series.

 

Trailer:

http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1810098780/video

PREDICTION:
"It looks really really cute! The addition of new fairytale characters not in 2006's Hoodwinked! should add to the fun."

*

13 Assassins

What's It About?

13 assassins fighting against the army of a wicked ruler.

 

Trailer:

http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1810096175/video

PREDICTION:
"It looks extremely cool--- sorta like 300--- minus 287 men with martial arts added into the mix!  "

*

The Arbor

What's It About?

True to life story of the self-destructive playwright Andrea Dunbar and her daughter who follows in her mother's footsteps.

 

Trailer:

http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1810151510/trailer

PREDICTION:
"It looks interesting and very haunting."

*

Prom

What's It About?

A group of teens as they prepare for their prom.

 

Trailer:

http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1810189802/video

PREDICTION:
"The prom plot has been overdone already but it does look cute enough."

*

Cave of Forgotten Dreams

What's It About?

Documentary of an expedition into the Chauvet Cave--- a cave known to hold some of the oldest art.

 

Trailer:

http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1810187767/video

PREDICTION:
"It looks fascinating! Sanctum-esque but on land."

*

Exporting Raymond

What's It About?

Documentary of a producer from the t.v. show Everybody Loves Raymond going to Russia to try to make the show for Russian audiences.

 

Trailer:

http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1810187393/video

PREDICTION:
"It looks like a really dull, pointless documentary. "

***

E N J O Y
*the*
M O V I E S

***

Best New Movie Poster of the Week

(Alternate character poster of Red for upcoming movie 

Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil.)

WHY THIS POSTER IS GREAT!:

*The character with her back facing forward rather than being face forward. 
*The fun character description.

(Alternate poster of Granny, Red and Wolf for upcoming 
movie Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil.)

WHY THIS POSTER IS GREAT!:

*The characters with their backs facing forward rather than being face forward.
*The tagline.

(Alternate character poster of Granny for 
upcoming movie Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil.)

WHY THIS POSTER IS GREAT!:

*The character with her back facing forward rather than being face forward. 
*The fun character description.

(Alternate character poster of Wolf and Twitchy for 
upcoming movie Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil.)

WHY THIS POSTER IS GREAT!:

*The fun character description.



***

Happy birthday Susana Spears!

Today is the birthday of one of my favorite porn stars ever, the gorgeous Susana Spears. Happy birthday!

Really quick second round preview

My first round preview was 3/4 in the east and 2/4 in the west. Might as well have flipped a coin.

East:

Caps - Bolts: Caps.

Sure, Tampa can shut down Pittsburgh's pathetic offense, but not the Caps'.

Flyers - Bruins: Flyers.

Boston's impotent power play will be a bigger detriment than the Flyers' musical goalies. Evenly matched for goonery.

West:

Canucks - Preds: Canucks.

A foregone conclusion, I'm afraid, but I'll be rooting for the Preds.

Sharks - Wings: Wings.

Better coaching and experience will tell.


That's it. Caps-Flyers and Nucks-Wings in the conference finals; Wings-Caps for the Cup.

found a costume

found a costume!

LOLITA

New X-Men First Class Trailer

I am ready for the summer movies. 

The Exile of Anna Prucnal

Anna Prucnal plays secondary heroine Anna Planeta in - you guessed it - Dusan Makavejev's 1974 cinematic masterpiece, Sweet Movie.  

Looking lovely as a young lass, pre-Sweet Movie.  She was a fairly prominent Polish stage and cinema actress and had a decent career as a singer.
At some point in the late 1960s/early 1970's, she found herself playing a scandalous role in one of the most talked about-not-talked about films to ever be made - Sweet Movie, near and dear to the hearts and minds of BC/HF.
Curiously enough, her character in the film would somewhat foreshadow what she would experience upon its release.

Her role is that of Anna Planeta, free-thinking, Marx-loving captain of the ship Survival, welcome nowhere on land.  She encounters the highly sexualized ex-sailor Potemkin, who she invites on board her candy-laiden vessel upon which they develop a very passionate, ultimately fatal relationship.

Oh yeah! That is totally sugar that they are covered in. Fascinating. Delicious.

The bed of sugar returns...this time more sinister. Too many sweets will rot your teeth, Potemkin.

This is possibly one of the most alarming stills from the film. Looks innocent enough, or does it? One of the main themes in Sweet Movie is sexuality, and often this sexuality is confusing or frightening to the recipient. Miss World Virginity, Carol Laure, has a very unpleasant honeymoon experience which leads to another odd sexual encounter with a certain Mr. Muscle.

This blog, however, is not about Carol Laure. It is about Anna Prucnal. In the questionable photo, she is seducing a small group of young (did I mention young!?) boys. On her ship of death, there is plenty of candy and sugary sweets to spare. Are the sweets there to interest the children or for Anna Planeta's pleasure?

 Either way, little boys like candy. Little boys also like semi-nude women, and Anna's got that covered as well.

Before you leave in utter disgust, take a moment to think. Cohorts have expressed to me that they felt most sexual as a child. Freud certainly got into that shit. We are all sexual as youngsters, though not necessarily involving others. Then we grow older, and we are taught to be embarassed. We might not like the idea of childhood sexuality, but it exists. That's the beauty of Sweet Movie. It shows the ugly truth, from the Katyn Forest Massacre (which had not been formally acknowledged at the time of the films release) to absurd displays of American consumerism.

Well, the Polish government didn't see things that way...

The government thought the film was "pornographic" even though it is only implied that Anna has sex with with the children, as opposed to graphic images of child nudity or anything of the like. The children appeared fully clothed, looking curiously at Anna. The rest is in your filthy imagination after Anna pulls the curtain. She does have sex with a grown man, but come on! It's 1974, people! The government of Poland also saw the film as "anticommunist" because it is heavy with political allegory.

So, what's a country like Poland to do?

Ban Anna from using her Polish passport, of course! Can't go home. Poland gave her the finger. That's like getting kicked out of New Jersey. Humiliating, but worse than that was that due to this political bullshit, Anna could not be at her dying mother's side. Like her character, Anna Planeta, she was unwelcome and forced to wander a world filled with death. France didn't seem to mind Miss Prucnal, and she continued to have a career there and in several surrounding countries, but spastic fans like BC/HF will mourn the ignorance of her home country as Anna mourns the loss of her mother.