Sunday, January 30, 2011

Quality Time

The NHL All Star Weekend is over, and it was great fun (as always). But I'm not here to talk about hockey, I'm here to talk about parenting.

Quality time, as Wikipedia informs one, is "an informal reference to time spent with loved ones (e.g., close family, partners or friends) which is in some way important, special, productive or profitable." Some parents feel the need to fill this time with programmed activities, thinking that they are better parents if they take their offspring to more exciting places and give them "experiences", maybe to make up for the limited amount of time they have to spend with their children.

Well, during the All Star weekend the players bring their kids to experience the weekend with them. They meet stars, they are in the middle of a great event, and maybe a once-in-a-lifetime experience. Yet when asked which star's autograph was the best Martin St. Louis' son says, "my daddy's."

And Danny Brière's son's reply when asked what the best part of the weekend is?

"Just hanging around with my dad."

FREE!

Its a new year, and for the first time it feels like it. Things are changing. Im changing. Im out of a relationship that i should have been out of ages ago. Theres no denying that i let it drag on. To be honest i new it wouldn't work as soon as he told me he wouldn't go to LACMA with me to see an exhibit by my favorite artist, Baldassari. Is that shallow? I read somewhere that dating younger guys is in style this year, but cheating never is so i think that just cancelled its self out. Shit. I should have thought that one threw.


Is it bad to say that im excited to be single? Cause im like giddy. I can finally concentrate on my self! Iv'e been going out to parties and even catching up with old friends. Im acting again and iv'e been getting a lot of call backs from agencies which is awesome. Im also doing pretty good in school. I mean i liked the security of having a boyfriend but i enjoy being alone a little too much to be in a relationship. Unless it was Mick Jagger. Hes my only exception.


Don't get me wrong, theres a down side too. First off im kind of a natural bitch, and i find it kind of hard to be nice to guys. I hate waiting for some guy to call or text me. I hate not having a boyfriend to talk to when im feeling like shit, but i also love the freedom and independence involved with being single. I don't have to inform anyone of the stuff im up to and everything goes better when im alone. No one expects anything from me and i don't expect anything from someone else.


I guess the search continues, but then again i dont think it ever really ends. Lets just hope that my search brings me to someone more like Todd Hacket then Homer Simpson. Or maybe someone that enjoys the day of the locust as much as i do. But in the meantime im happy. I have good friends, a family that loves me, and my self. I think i love my self more then ever. I think im pretty fucking awesome and thats all that counts.


Taking a Break

I am working on organizing my comics.  It is really fun!  Anyway, enjoy some Carl ranting about a week without a football...

Friday, January 28, 2011

GOTW

As I was sitting here going through all of my comics (yeah, it is a boat load of fun), I started thumbing through 100 Bullets, which is a fantastic read, and I remembered how hot Megan Dietrich was, and how much of a major bitch she could be.  She was a bit of slut, liked to play Benito and his father of each other (and I think she slept with both of them).  But, she is one of the most powerful people in the world and that makes her even hotter.  Sadly, I could not find any good pictures of her, so you will just have to buy the comics and read them yourself.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Taxes and Titans

Last night I decided to do two very torturous things to myself:  my taxes and watch Clash of the Titans.  Which should I start with, I will take the lesser of two evils:  taxes.

Taxes
Last year I used TurboTax and it was a good experience, so I figured I would use it again.  One of the things I have discovered is that it does not matter that I give money to charity or that I save my receipts for my work shoes and clothes.  None of these things make my refund any different. 

It is also so depressing to look at your gross pay and then see how much you lost in taxes.  This reminds me that I need to set up a 401K, might as well lose that money before the taxes come out.  Also, I wonder if I donate all my comics to charity, if I claim them will that affect my refund?  It would have to, right? 

I do recommend using TurboTax if you have a simple tax return and want to get it done and over with.  My return should be in my account in the next eight to fourteen days.  And I have a few plans for that money, but more on that to come later in life.

Clash of the Titans
I heard this movie was terrible, but terrible does not do it justice.  I just did not understand why the hell they felt the need to take the story of Perseus and mangle it all up.  Why was Hades trying to kill Zeus?  In the original myth, Hades helps Perseus by giving him a helmet (or was it a cloak?) that makes him invisible.

I also hated how crappy the Djinn looked.  Wait, why were they even in the movie?  Why did the scorpion scenes feel like a rip-off from Transformers?  Oh, because it was pretty much identical.  And what the hell is Hollywood's fascination with the kraken?  This was not the creature from the original myth, why would you change it?

The biggest irritation was the whole Io subplot.  Why was she even in this movie?  Io was turned in a cow after having sex with Zeus, then she went to Egypt (I cannot remember all her adventures, sue me).  Perseus is supposed to save Andromeda and then marry her.  Granted, I thought that Gemma Arterton was hotter than Alexa Davalos, but it seems like they needed to put a character in to help Perseus and did not want to use Athena (who helps Perseus in the myth).

I would try to say something good about the movie, but there was not that much.  I like Sam Worthington (he was great in Terminator Salvation) and I thought Medusa looked pretty good.  That was one scene where they bumped up the action and it actually was good.

Needless to say, I am glad I did not see this in the theater.  I would have probably got up halfway through and left. 

Since I know you are asking who the girl to the left is, I figured I would make you all work it out.  Just kidding, this is Natalia Vodianova, she played Medusa.  Not going to lie, I would stare at her until I turned into stone.

Badass Mechanic




The Verdict:
GO SEE!

REVIEW:
Action star Jason Statham is badass as expected, playing a "Mechanic"--- really an assassin who regretfully follows orders to kill a friend. Statham shoots his gun and kicks ass with such wonderful bravado! Ben Foster is great as his sarcastic, loose cannon sidekick assassin. Fans of the original 70's The Mechanic with the original badass Charles Bronson, should really enjoy. But action movie fans in general are guaranteed to get an adrenaline fix from Statham's action-packed, bloody The Mechanic.


Wednesday, January 26, 2011

New Movies Playing!


The Mechanic
What's It About?
An assassin seeks revenge on his boss after he's ordered to murder a friend--- training his murdered friend's son to be an assassin in the process.


Trailer:



PREDICTION:
"It looks so cool! Lots of action and tons of fun gun play to be expected. Jason Statham always delivers action."



*


IP Man 2
What's It About?
The story of real life Chinese marital arts grandmaster, Ip Man.


Trailer:
 
PREDICTION:
"It looks wow! just from the small clips of martial arts moves shown--- so the entire movie has to be even more amazing."




*


The Rite
What's It About?
A young priest who learns how to perform exorcisms in the Vatican.


Trailer:

PREDICTION:
"It looks pretty scary even though I don't find most exorcism movies scary."



*


 From Prada to Nada
What's It About?
Two rich Beverly Hills sisters move into a poor Los Angeles neighborhood after their father dies.


Trailer:



PREDICTION:
"It looks like a waste of time to have been made and to go see."








***
E N J O Y
*the*
M O V I E S
***


Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Let's play Goblin Camp!

As it happens, Minecraft doesn't actually run on my personal laptop, because my display drivers are just that old. It's a good thing, really, as it means I have to do something other than just play Minecraft. These days, that other is Goblin Camp.



Now, if that looks like a totally incomprehensible blob of ASCII art, it's because it is. Never fear; I'll walk you through it.

**

Goblin Camp is an opensource indie game developed by some goon. You can get it on the website here, and we impartially reviewed an earlier version here. This is version 0.13.

As that goon has it, Goblin Camp is a roguelike citybuilder. Your mission is to build and manage, well, a goblin camp in the wilderness. This is what you start with:



The blue "o"s are orcs, and the grey "g"s goblins. Using your initial population and the tools you're given, your job is to transform this forest clearing into a thriving camp.

The first steps are to place some stockpiles and farm plots. Everything you gather and produce in the game is placed in stockpiles, and crops are grown on farm plots. In the picture below, the three brown rectangles are my farm plots, and the larger rectangles are stockpiles.



Placing stockpiles and farm plots is easy; select either one from the Build menu and paint them onto the map by click-dragging.



When you click on a stockpile, it opens a window where you control what kind of goods get placed in the stockpile:



Similarly, on a farm plot you toggle what kinds of crops get planted in the plot. Crops are planted in spring and harvested in the autumn.



After placing stockpiles and farm plots, it's time to get building! The basic building material in Goblin Camp is wood, which comes from trees:



Getting your goblins to chop down trees is as easy as anything. All the commands in the game are simply accessible through a right-click menu:



There, simply select "Orders" and "Designate trees":



And select an area.



The trees in that area will be tagged for cutting if and when wood is required.



You manage your inventory through the Stock Manager, seen here:



We're going to need some logs to build a saw pit, so we just order up logs in the Stock Manager.

Building a workshop is as easy as anything else: select the building in the Build menu and place it on the map.



Alas, I can't place the saw pit yet because I don't have any logs. Don't worry; Koppak the goblin is here to fix that problem!



You can see what your orcs and goblins get up to in the Jobs screen. The tasks are color-coded for priority, with green being highest and red lowest.



The last step to getting your camp up and running is to place the spawning pool. If you look closely at the above screenshot, you can see some brown tildes (~) scattered around the camp. Those, dear readers, are filth. In this game, goblins and orcs reproduce via the good offices of the spawning pool: goblins dump filth and corpses in the spawning pool, and orcs and goblins crawl out. As more filth and corpses are dumped in, the pool expands.



**

Once you've placed your spawning pool, you sort of start playing and forget that you were supposed to be making a blog post. And before you know it, the camp looks like this:



Oops.

One of the cardinal design principles of Goblin Camp is that as your camp gets more complex and you're able to do more things, it also gets more dangerous. The grey area on the map is exposed rock, and the square in it is my stone quarry. All the carnage around it is a result of the quarry's twofold nature. On the one hand, it gets you stone, which is handy for a lot of things; on the other hand, soldier ants occasionally attack from the quarry.



Above, I've added more hazard-producing constructions next to the quarry: a charcoal burning clamp and clay pit. You can see how that's worked out from the blood spattered all over them.



Here's another innovation: a pontoon bridge. There's a bog on the other side of the river, and I've sent my goblins to gather bog iron from it. The bridge is there to speed up the trip.



As you can see, the camp gets pretty muddy, so I've built duckboards through it; they're the brown double exclamation mark. Without duckboards, the interior of your camp will fast become unnavigable. When you've placed some duckboards, you again forget that you're meant to be writing a blog post, and so don't have any more screenshots.

**

As I've said, this is still version 0.13. Most of the features that goon is planning for his game aren't there yet, so at the moment it really is just a sort of ASCII Simcity with orcs. One big warning, though: it's a fun ASCII Simcity with orcs. This thing is eating up my leisure time like, well, Minecraft.

If you're at all interested in this kind of game, go check it out. It's an open source project and there are functioning forums, so if you get into it, you can get involved with the development. I have some faith this game might be going places, but even if it doesn't, it's fun right now.

A Bunch of Football Stuff

Allow me to start out by saying how excited I am for the Steelers to be in the Super Bowl.  I also think it will be a fantastic game between them and the Packers.  Both teams are so similar, which should make it interesting.  As you know though, the next two weeks will be filled with every conceivable story about both teams.

Just Make It Stop Already
-Aaron Rodgers was Brett Favre's backup and has finally risen up and led his team to the Super Bowl.  Seriously, there will be so many stories about Brett Favre.  Hell, at some point there will be speculation about him playing next season (as James said via facebook:  "I wouldn't be surprised if he played for the Bills next season.")  We all remember how the Packers decided to ignore Favre when he wanted to return and finally allow Rodgers the chance to take the reins.  It was only like three seasons ago.

-The trials and tribulations of Ben Roethlisberger.  Did you know that he was suspended for the first four games of the season?  Everyone will tell us this, but no one will mention for what.  Actually a few will say something like "stemming from an alleged sexual assault during the summer."  I like Big Ben (as a quarterback) and I am sure that he is trying to be a good person, but I really do not care that he from the ashes and led his team to the Super Bowl.  It feels like every writer had these stories written for Michael Vick and now that he is out of the playoffs, they will just replace Vick with Big Ben and killed dogs with alleged sexual assault.

-Mike McCarthy is from Pittsburgh.  I am sure this will get mentioned a few hundred times.  Who cares?  Is McCarthy going to make bad calls because he was a Steelers fan as a kid?  Probably not.  Who will his family be rooting for?  All that kind of dumb shit will just annoy the hell out of me.

-These storied franchises.  The team of the 60s vs. the team of the 70s!  I know it is a cool thing, but seriously, every football fan already knows how they are both great franchises.  Please do not dumb down the discussion by explaining this to us.  Hell, only a few of the coaches were even alive to see those Packers teams.  Not many of the players were alive to see the Steelers teams of the 70s.  Why not just focus on the here and now?  These teams have a chance to kick off the race to see who will be the team of the 20Teens (what the hell else should we call this decade?).

-How young Mike Tomlin is.  We have a young coach, the youngest to ever lead his team to a second Super Bowl.  No shit, he was the youngest coach to win a Super Bowl.  If the Steelers go again in the next twenty of so years, he will probably still be the youngest coach to lead his team to three Super Bowls.  Why?  Most coaches are old, Tomlin is really young.  And I am sure there will be a few jokes about how he looks like Omar Epps...

My Thoughts on Jay Cutler
Most of you by now have heard about how players criticized  Jay Cutler (via Twitter) for leaving the game on Sunday.  From what I have heard, the team doctors were the ones who were not sure about the extent of the injury and decided he could not play.  What if he would have went back in and thrown a few interception because he could not plant his leg and get a solid throw?  People would have said how he was hurting his team by being in there.  What if he goes back out and gets hit and ends his career?  How many people would then be saying how silly it was for him to go back in the game?  I do think it is great that the Bears defensive players have his back and as Chris Harris said yesterday on the Jim Rome show, they know which players said what, they will be looking for them next season. 

Mark Sanchez To Lead The League in Picks
funny gifs

My Plans
Friday before the Super Bowl, I will be at the Pens game with Lindsey, Adam, and Lora.  We are then going out that night and then we are going to come back to Ebensburg on Saturday, then head back to Pittsburgh to watch the game in the city.  What better way to spend the Super Bowl then down in the Steel City?

My prediction for the game:  27-23 Steelers!  Oh, and if you want to see me on television, I suggest you click this link.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Happy birthday Veronica Vanoza!

Veronica Vanoza is a gorgeous Czech porn star; what more reason do you need?



At least I think it's her birthday. The Internet is what it is. But I'm posting these pictures anyway.



Happy birthday!

Batman: The Dark Knight Rises

I have had a few people ask me about this, so I figured I might as well write about it.  Remember when I wrote about the third Batman film after I saw Inception?  It appears that I was correct about Tom Hardy playing one the villain, unfortunately I got it kind of wrong.  Christopher Nolan says that Hardy will play the bad guy Bane.  In a surprise move though, Anne Hathaway has been chosen to play Catwoman.

I have no problem with the castings of either of them, yet I do have to wonder about how these two will tie into the idea of Batman rising up as the hero of Gotham.  Will Bane be written like he was in the original Knightsend story?  He was extremely strong because of the Venom drug, but he was also somewhat smart.  He wanted to weaken Batman before fighting him.  He released all the bad guys from Arkham Asylum and then when Batman was nearly exhausted he chose to fight him and break him.

I would imagine that the movie will start with Gotham being hit by some sophisticated cat burglar.  Batman will track the person down, only to realize it is a woman.  They will spar and flirt and in the end she will escape.  How does this tie into Bane though?  Will Bane come to Gotham to try and take over the gangs?  Does he want to take over the entire city?  Maybe he hires Catwoman to find out who Batman really is?
Have you seen the film Havoc?  Who knew she was such a dirty girl...

Anyways, here are some things I do not want to see in this film:

-Supernatural powers or backgrounds for Catwoman.  No cat-god powers, no nine lives, none of that nonsense.  Just make her a cat burglar who likes to dress like a cat or something.  Keep it simple.

-Bane as just some hired thug.  If the gangs hire him to kill Batman, it will be incredibly stupid.  I mean, did they forget how well it worked out using the Joker?

-Batman taking his mask off to talk Catwoman out of killing someone.  The downfall of Batman movies always seems when the actor playing Batman wants more lines or screen time.  Do you realize how often Batman takes his mask off in the comics?  Pretty much never.  Nolan has done a good job of keeping it on most of them, just do it again for one more movie.  Not even if Christian Bale starts screaming at him...

-Please Mr. Nolan, do not introduce some kind of new Bat-suit.  I am okay with a new Batmobile, maybe even splurging and seeing a Batplane, but the one thing I really hate is when they change the suit.  It just never makes sense.  Unless it serves the movie.  I mean, yes, in the last one, it made sense for Bruce to want a suit that would stop dogs and allow his head to turn.  I just do not want to see an all new design or some specialty suit, like the fire proof sonar suit.  Ugh.

I really hope they use a suit similar to this...
-The love story.  Obviously that is why Catwoman will be making her debut in this film.  However, keep it to her and Batman.  Do not bring in the idiotic Selina Kyle/Bruce Wayne relationship.  In fact, make sure that Selina never knows Batman's identity.  And under no circumstances should they figure out each others secret by some stupid back and forth like "mistletoe can be deadly if you eat it...a kiss can be deadlier if you mean it."

Anyways, I am excited about the film and I completely trust Christopher Nolan.  I am sure he will make a great movie and that it will finish up his trilogy quite nicely.  And then in a few years, they can bring another director and actor in and completely screw it all up.

Friday, January 21, 2011

Thank You Jesus For This One Small Miracle!

I realize that my title may confuse some of you, since I do not believe in miracles and whatnot.  All day at work I kept worrying that Carl would pick the Steelers this week and pretty much doom them.  Fortunately he went with the NFC, which means the Steelers are in pretty good shape.  Thanks Carl!

GOTW


This week's GOTW is one of the stars of Lie to Me, no not Tim Roth, but instead Monica Raymund, who plays Torres.  I enjoy the show and I definitely enjoy checking her out.  Sadly, I cannot find any great pictures, but if you watch the show, you will see what I mean.

NARGIS FAKHRI






The 21-year-old Nargis, who has also featured in the 2009 Kingfisher Calendar has been cast opposite Ranbir Kapoor in the movie.